24 November 2013

Tips on dealing heartbreak and getting over someone

Before getting started with this post, the reasons why I'm posting this is because I had received several emails regarding about advice of getting over somebody. Ofcourse, here I am trying to help some of you to overcome this tough days ahead. I've been through this days and ofcourse I have found back my old self, I want to be stronger and wiser than before. I'm proud of myself for pulling through this horrible hanging heartache even though its not easy along the way and thankful for ones who stay with me. Soooo continue reading! ;) 

Heartbreaks? Yeah everyone sure do get them once in awhile. Most people at one time or another have felt the gut wrenching, chest tightening, body convulsing, very much physical pain of having your heart broken. Anyone can experience heartbreak and for a number of different reasons. When we are in love with someone, it can make us do crazy things and completely lose the ability to think rationally and act completely out of normal character. Am I right to say that?

Unfortunately, love can be an addictions nowadays. Now the questions is, how do you get over someone after a heavy heartbreak? This is the probably the hardest to start with, it takes a lot of courage and determination. It is easiest to make this step when acting out of anger, or slamming in the middle of an almighty argument. Try to avoid this at all costs. 

Wait until you are in a calm and rational state of mind. Tell yourself or even make a list of all the reasons the decision is right for you. Include things like, if you are unhappy? how long you have felt this way? if you can ever see the situation changing? If the bad times out weigh the good? Try not to reminisce about the past too much and the ‘good times.’ good times in the past are never going to be enough to keep you going for now. It's over and now you have to think of ways to back yourself up. Try to have focus on your other day to day duties, going to work, doing your assignments, cooking dinner/lunch. All these little things are your routine, and without them you will find it very hard to adjust. It is very easy in the first few weeks after a breakup to completely fall apart, to struggle to get out of bed, not eat and not sleep and to just want to lie there wasting away. If you give into these urges you will fall into a depression that will become incredibly hard to get out of. What you can help yourself now is pick yourself up from where you fall. 

We all know that missing somebody is an incredibly painful feeling especially when both of you were over. Do not let it get the better of you, although the little thoughts about how you might you do it properly and the original reasons that you left in the first place still stand. Keep all this off your mind, after a month you will look back and take satisfaction in the fact you’ve gone that long clean of that person, and it will push you on to go for longer. There might still be lots of things that trigger off memories. However you will start to notice that they are not quite as painful as they used to be or as raw. By this stage you will have become a lot stronger within yourself. :) 

Tips on how to get over someone

#1 Set a deadline - Let it all out! Groan, complain, cuss, whine and pine. Call your best friend and start cry like a 3-year-old. Grieve hard but not forever, pull out your calendar and choose a date when you'll dry your tears and pull yourself together. 
#2 Write about it - Take sometime and settle down, get a diary or a piece of paper to rant it all out. It's a safe place to express your disappointment, reflect on what happened and make a list of all the qualities you're looking for in your next mate.

#3 Spend time with friends/familyCall your girlfriends and make a date for lunch or a movie. You may have neglected them a little since you fell head over heels (we've all done it), Besides, there's no better place to go to for sympathy than to your girls. Or if you have a trusted male friend you can confide in, he may be able to help you see your situation from a man's perspective so you can gain some clarity on what happened with your ex. Just make sure your "friend" is an absolutely platonic one. This is definitely not the time to start something on the rebound that will complicate your current situation.    

#4 Do something that you've always wanted to do - Forget about all your pie-in-the, sky couple-oriented plans. What have you always dreamed of doing? If you've been procrastinating about making a major move, now's the time. You'll learn to do something exciting or useful, and you'll also get a special sense of accomplishment because you did it on your own.

#5 Start learn from your mistakes and take it as an experiencesyou should try not to be too self deprecating. If you are going to pick yourself up and move on then you are going to have to love yourself and love life. 

#6 Stop stalking them on social media - The urge of knowing what are they doing, you may not want to see if they're happy and doing fine without you. Get rid of them, unfollow them when it's nessessary as long as it keeps you happy. It's never illegal to unfollow someone who hurt you! 

Nobody deserve unhappy love. Believe in yourself and be patience because good things are worth the wait and worth the fight.

With that, best of luck!
and lastly...

Anymore advice, feel free to drop me an email! I'm here for you, cheer up and be happy :)

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